The Middle Sister: My untimely quarterly post

Since I am now setting slacker goals - I am A-OK with the fact that my last post was 3+ months ago. ;)

I somehow got roped into subbing for my mom while she was on a cruise (elementary music and computer). I told her that I would sub for her if she promised I wouldn’t have to SING. The first instruction she gives me when I show up is:

“Well - first you will sing the Star Spangled Banner acappella with the kids”. Ummmm . . . wait a minute . . . .

She also taught me how to work the CD player in the room - apparently you have to move a mug over the top of the CD at just..... the....... right........ spot so that the CD will play. *sigh*

During computer class I had one of the kids pouting (Keep in mind that they get to play computer games while I am subbing).

Pouting Child: “Can I just sit here? I don’t want to play anything.”

Me: “Get the website up on your computer and then you can just sit and stare at the game while you don’t play it.

He totally played the game the entire time. *sucker*

And what is with kids just putting their arms in the air as though they are asking a question? Is that a restful position?! It is pretty much a 50/50 shot that they have a question.

Common Phrases I found myself saying out loud that week:

Stop touching each other. stop touching each other. Stop touching each other.
Keep your arms in your shirt arm holes.
no you may not jumprope.
do not hide under the risers.
Why are you missing a shoe?
Do not touch the piano. Do not touch the piano. Do not touch the piano.

And then a constant stream of comments to me:

*They aren’t lining up in the right order! (WHAT IS WITH KIDS NEEDING THE SAME ORDER EVERY DAY?!)
He hit me.
She stepped on my foot
He said something mean.

And I respond with: “Tell your teacher.”:)

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I recently signed up to sell Usborne Books. (1) because I need another odd random job in my life; (2) I obviously am addicted to self-employment tax crap; and (3) I LOVE BOOKS AND THESE ARE AMAZING.

So . . on a serious note. If you want suggestions on books your kid will like - please email me and I will send you suggestions. Or check out my website at: www.sabrinareads.com

In other news -the Matilda Jane Spring Collection is so cute it might make you throw up.

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Since my parents were gone on vacation - Brother2 stayed with us. This means he now has the “find your friends” app installed on his phone - much to his disappointment. :) I have also been making notes for him on “proper dating techniques”. He no doubt appreciates mom and dad more so my job is done.

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The Lucky Day Spring Sale was a smashing success. Again. I have no idea why I get so nervous. My vendors ROCK and the shoppers are the sweetest. We were located at the Watertown Mall for this Sale and the space worked out perfectly.

packed with awesomeness!

The really cute stuff is never mine. :)

Friend Stacey and Sister2 are my check-out Wizards

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We recently adopted Pepper the Parrot. We are now . . . wait for it . . parronts. I know. pathetic. Pepper is the BEST. He chats and whistles and meows and now makes Mel’s pathetic bark. He says phrases like: “Drink your water, Pepper; Gotta Go; Come Here, Good Boy, See ya later".

And now tonight he said a bunch of gibberish and I said: "What?"
And Pepper replied with: "You heard me - answer me."

I have no idea where he learned his manners.

He loves almonds, noodles, cereal, crackers and anything we happen to be eating. I need to try fruit and veggies but that means I actually need to go and BUY healthy food.

Pepper also loves watching television with us. The other night he was sitting on my shoulder and the following conversation ensued:

Me: Pepper, can I pet you?
Pepper dips his head so I can pet his head.
Boyd: Pepper, can I pet you?
Pepper gives him an icy stare that translates into "Hell no."

Me: Pepper, please let Boyd pet you. It's okay.
Pepper gives a "parrot sigh" and bows his head relunctantly.

Gads, I love this bird.

Currently, he is chewing on an old tennis shoe I put in his cage - Happy as a clam.

Sweetest bird ever. I feel like Snow White and even sing to him. :)

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Speaking of health food and tennis shoes, I cannot for the life of me find the will to get in shape. I see all these vacationers on Facebook and I think . . . Gosh, that SEEMS like a good idea but I am starving so I’m going to go bake a cake.

I wish I was kidding.

Boyd somehow got “thyroiditis” this past month. I was FREAKING OUT for quite awhile waiting for test results, etc. He was having terrible headaches continually and taking long naps when he got home from school. I began calling his doctor’s office. After Boyd got back from his appointment, I asked jokingly, “So, did the doc mention you have a psycho wife?”

And Boyd said: “He alluded to something like that.”

Fair enough.